Tea Tea


Can I interest any of you in a coffee coffee? A lemonade lemonade? Maybe you’re more of a chai tea person...  

 Now some of you might question why only one of those answers seems grammatically correct, and alas ‘old sport,’ you’ve fallen into a stereotype without realizing it. Chai is the word for tea in just about every Indian language, and every time we hear ‘Chai Tea,’ a yellow car personally smacks our Wilson soul. Now I’m not here to go all ‘Tom’ on you, as unlike his cheating, Chai Tea is an innocent mistake and can be fixed by simply listening and learning!  

Wait...tea, cars, cheating husband, a female dying in a crash...this sounds pretty familiar... 

What love story could possibly have all that in common? It’s Diana, Chapped Lips, and Temu Diana, of course!  

Here’s how Diana and King Manchild are pretty similar to Daisy and Tom :D  

  1. The Age Gap: Kind of an expected trend for the time period, but both the royal relationship and Fitzgerald’s fiction both have an East Egg man with a rich young woman—but how young? Try a 13- and 8-year difference respectively, where they 19 during the early relationship. Tom and Chalk walked so Leo DiCaprio could run- 


     

  1. Loving Both: In the early stages of their relationships, both Tom and Chemical originally loved their current wife, but found someone they loved more, notably sneaking away to take calls with the mistress. In both instances, the wife KNEW of the mistress, yet had their hands tied in a possible breakup, whether emotionally or by status.  


  1.  

    ‘Deadbeat’: Both relationships hit a wall, crashed out, turned—whatever verb you’d like there—when one of the women were involved in a fatal car crash...kind of crazy how Fitzgerald basically predicted an English royal plot in while writing in France...about Americans.  


Although the 1900s saw major improvements in freedom and rights, style, and truly being yourself, don’t be like Tom Buchanan—or Chump for that matter— and instead say EITHER Chai or Tea, you don’t get extra credit for having both.  

 

For you casuals who didn't get it, every capitalized 'C' word is just me avoided Charles' name :D


Comments

  1. AnonymousOctober 20, 2024 at 8:59 AM

    Here’s your comment you silly needy individual :) (also calling Charles “Chapped Lips” is hilarious)

    ReplyDelete

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